Openings

gaining closure
issue subsides
grounding the future

“The supreme art of war is to subdue the enemy without fighting.”- Sun Tzu

It has been an emotionally tough couple of weeks. A little more confrontation, a little more introspection than I might have liked.  Challenges to self-concept I am still wrestling with, and probably will wrestle with for awhile. Sure to be a good thing, right? Right? Just asking myself . . . myself is definitely, positively not sure . . .

Yesterday, I finally killed one of my maps. Well, I suppose I could tape it back together. . . no . . . no, the thought of a taped map - very disturbing, wouldn't feel right.

All these bumps in the road, well not even sure which is the road. It is really ok. I want to say I don't like complacency or stagnation, but oh do I love to be comfortable.

So the map. Well, I remember I had an exciting experience while waiting to meet friends for dinner at Pike Place Market. I went into one of the coffee bars. They were featuring some interesting local artists on their walls.

I was looking at a textured landscape. As I got closer I noticed scattered, small pieces of the texture were actually very small scraps of maps. Most no bigger than an 1/8 of an inch wide, no more than an inch or two wide.

So I am peering at the map on my desks suddenly it is very large, wondering about the possibilities of some sort of collage, what will I mixed with it, visions of handmade gift wrap papers come to mind . . . wonderful creative ideas forming in my head. Unfortunately, often, the realist seeing so many possibilities, failing in picking one. Now I am thinking, well, heck it a big map, and no one said the collage had to be good . . . I think it just needs to be fun. Believe I have the perfect backing so, maybe . . . 

I start my new shift tonight. Such a mixture of feeling from others. Some having difficulty with the concept, some worrying some of my time will be alone (feeling sad for me). My compatriots in the established night crew being so overwhelming kind and happy is their messages to me. They have always claimed me as one of them. It is the place where I better fit. We all knew I would make the shift someday.

The bonus was not having to telecommute. A huge relief. Something so many want so much. I like going to the office. I love the quiet in the huge space as other leave. 

And I love the 3 am drive time home. It is such a prefect time to me. Of course, the light traffic is a blessing. It is the nature of the time. Those out socializing in bars pretty much home, those early commuters not on the road yet to start their day. It is like a pause in the fabric of the day between the end and the beginning. It feels so peaceful.