New To Me

I was the recipient of an extremely escalated call, misdirected, the gentleman needed help from an entirely different company. After many rounds of prolific swearing (unappeased, by empathy, apologies that the call was misdirected, by the fact we have nothing to do with fruit shipments), his voice rose to a crescendo. "Well, someone is greasing up the wrong monkey here."

Thank god, I am sorry the man was able to get what he needed. However, I am excited to get a phrase I have never heard before.

Overheard, a woman not being able to access what she wanted in a vending machine:
"How the hell do they expect me to be spiritual if they cut me off from my food source>"

Indeed, an interesting life.